this week has been a horrible one. but today was definitely the worst. i've never felt so shitty and guilty before in my whole entire life. im crying as i type this. honestly, i never knew how much you went through because of us. i never would have guessed how much you cried at night because of us. i'm sorry for making you this way. i'm sorry for not ever changing the person i was. saying sorry a million times won't ever make up for how much you did for us, and how much you suffered. and it won't bring us back to when things we're going all well. But after you opened up to me, i'm going to give it my everything and make it up to you. So that you may have a smile on your face before you go to bed, while you're sleeping, and after you wake up. I don't ever want to be the cause of your tears every night, nor do i ever want to see you cry again. It's the thing i hate most. Seeing you cry. it pains my heart so much you don't even know. But what i feel when i see you cry is nothing to what you're going through right now. But just know that i'm here for you now. I'm trying my best not just for you or for us two, but for all four of us. Because we're a family. And we're going to be with you by your side to support you and help you out because we're a family. Families spend the good and bad times together. And that is what we'll do. Feel free to come to any one of us when you're sad or when you're having troubles and we will definitely listen to you and try to help you solve it. I may regret all that i did to you in the past, but it's not too late to start over and make things right, right? i love you alot. And i wouldn't have survived all these years if it weren't for you. I'm forever in debt of you, and you have no clue how grateful i am and how blessed i am for God to spend you to me.<3

and thankyou nicole for always being there for me these few days when i broke down. im so thankful towards you.